Relationship Advice: Sometimes It’s Not What You Say But Rather What You Don’t Say

relationship advice

By Jackie Pilossoph, Editor-in-chief, Divorced Girl Smiling, Love Essentially columnist and author

I feel like I’m constantly giving relationship advice on what to say, how to say things, and what not to say. But sometimes it’s better to say nothing at all, to embrace the peacefulness and calmness of silence. That’s the subject of this week’s Love Essentially.

When and how to use the power of silence in a relationship  by Jackie Pilossoph for Chicago Tribune Media Group

There’s no doubt that effective communication is a key ingredient in sustaining a happy, healthy romantic relationship.




But sometimes couples focus so much on how to talk to each other — what to say, what not to say, how to say something — that they forget about the importance of two things: listening to their partner and just sitting together in silence.

Three things happened to me recently that caused me to realize the power and benefits that can come from less talking and more listening.

First, someone at my company gave me a tip on how to improve communication with some of my clients.

“So many salespeople focus way too much on describing the features and benefits of their product instead of just sitting down with the client, asking questions and just listening,” she said.

She explained that when you let someone else talk about their needs, they are really selling themselves because they have the clarity of their own voice convincing them.


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That same day…(Click here to read the rest of the article, published in the Chicago Tribune Pioneer Press editions)

Like this article? Check out, “25 Lies People Tell In Relationships”


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Jackie Pilossoph

Editor-in-chief: Jackie Pilossoph

Divorce is a journey. Live it with grace, courage and gratitude. Peace and joy are on the way! Jackie Pilossoph is the creator and Editor-In-Chief of Divorced Girl Smiling. The author of the novels, Divorced Girl Smiling and Free Gift With Purchase, Pilossoph also writes the weekly dating and relationships advice column, “Love Essentially”, published in the Chicago Tribune Pioneer Press and the Chicago Tribune online. Additionally, she is a Huffington Post contributor. Pilossoph holds a Masters degree in journalism from Boston University.

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