Divorce is undeniably difficult—emotionally taxing, confusing, and often overwhelming. The good news is, if you learn how to empower yourself during divorce, it will help you find clarity, experience less fear, and have an outcome that will offer you a good post-divorce life.
Here are 7 ways to empower yourself during divorce:
1. Find an Attorney You Trust
Comfort and compatibility are key when interviewing potential divorce attorneys. During consultations, ask yourself if this person is resonating with your communication style and goals, whether you’re leaning toward amicable negotiations (perhaps including mediation) or are anticipating litigation. It’s perfectly okay to speak with multiple attorneys before deciding on the one who feels right for you.
2. Ensure You’re Mentally Prepared
Divorce often involves emotional evolution—confusion, denial, even hope. There’s no deadline for clarity. You’ll know when you’re ready. Therapy or coaching can help you process these feelings and confirm that divorce is the path you want to commit to.
3. Visualize the Life You Want
What will your post-divorce life look like? Begin with small, yet tangible, questions: Do you want to keep the marital home? Does it make sense to rent? Should you consider moving in with family? Consider your ideal living situation and how to achieve that goal. In doing so, you will need to consider your financial stability, and if children are involved, what geographic constraints exist given your anticipated parenting plans.
4. Develop a Financial and Lifestyle Plan
Understanding your financial situation is critical to making informed decisions. I strongly suggest that you speak with a mortgage lender (especially a certified divorce lending professional) if you’re considering keeping the home. A financial advisor can help you map out assets, income and support options. Taking these steps ahead of time will assist you in making informed, confident decisions, which will empower you throughout the divorce process.
5. Practice Positive Self-Talk
Divorce can bring internal turmoil. Instead of self-criticism, choose affirmations like: “I’m smart, resourceful, and capable of thriving.” This mental shift isn’t just uplifting, it’s a strategy for navigating your divorce with courage and resilience.
You’re not in this alone. Lean on trusted friends and family for emotional support. Then, layer in your divorce support professionals, such as therapists, financial planners and mortgage advisors, so that you are walking through this journey with a full team behind you.
7. Collaborate with Your Attorney
Effective representation starts with clear, two-way communication. Ask questions, review documents, and share feedback. The best attorneys explain legal jargon, outline your options clearly, and invite your collaboration.
Why These Steps Matter
- Knowledge = Empowerment: Understanding your options, from mediation to litigation, gives you clarity and agency.
- Planning Reduces Anxiety: A tangible vision of your future: where you’ll live, how finances will flow and what your daily life will look like, can ease the emotional burden.
- Support Bolsters Strength: Whether through friends, professional services, or positive affirmations, having a team by your side ensures that you won’t feel isolated and can move forward with confidence.
Final Thoughts
Empowerment during divorce comes from being informed, intentional, and emotionally grounded. If you actively lean into these seven steps, you’ll not only navigate the process more smoothly, you’ll also emerge stronger, clearer, and more confident in building the life ahead of you.
Like this article? Check out “A Divorce Attorney’s Words of Encouragement“