Dating is hard enough, but dating as a divorced parent brings on a whole other set of challenges, from finding time to spend together to introducing the kids or not–it’s a fine line. In this week’s Love Essentially, I shared the story of a frustrated reader who is dating a divorced mom. I also offered 6 dating tips for divorced parents.
6 Dating Tips For Divorced Parents
by Jackie Pilossoph for Chicago Tribune Media Group
All relationships have challenges and issues. Even in the best of romances—those with an amazing connection, intense passion and a genuine friendship – times can get tough, and that’s when you find yourself at Starbucks telling your friend over an iced cinnamon dolce latte that you are feeling frustrated, disappointed and unsure about the relationship you thought just a week ago was blissful, even perfect.
Relationships take on a whole different set of complexities when one or both people are divorced parents. This reader is a good example:
I have been dating a divorced woman with a 5-year-old daughter for a year and a half. I love her and her daughter greatly, and it seems they both love me, too. The only wrinkle is, her ex of 11 years throws fits when she or they go anywhere with me. He does not have a good place to visit the child, so she lets him use her house. If I leave anything over at her house, she has to hide it before he sees it, i.e. cough drops, shampoo, etc. I try to be patient and understanding, but the other night we had a date and he was supposed to come over to stay with their daughter. She told me not to come to the door when I got there, that she would come out and meet me because he didn’t want to see me. He texted her the entire time during our date. When we headed back to the house, she had me stop and let her out, and told me to drive around and that when he left, I could come in.
Let’s start with the mom. It seems like she is trying to keep everyone happy – her daughter, her boyfriend and her ex-husband. While understandable, I don’t think she should have to walk on eggshells around her ex-husband or hide her boyfriend from him. They have been divorced for over a decade, plus she is doing her ex a huge favor by allowing him in her home to spend time with their daughter.
As for the boyfriend, (Click here to read the rest of the article, published in the Chicago Tribune Pioneer Press editions, along with the Chicago Tribune and several other newspapers across the U.S.)
Like this article? Check out, “21 Dating Tips I wish I could have shared with my 21 year old self.”