Versus writing a blog post about how thankful we should all be on Thanksgiving, I decided the best way I could help single, newly separated and/or divorced men and women on this holiday is to talk about being alone on Thanksgiving, or even feeling alone on the holiday.
Thanksgiving is a holiday that screams family, food, fun, and NOT being or feeling alone. But the reality is, some people won’t have that kind of day. Maybe your family lives out of town, maybe you just got separated and your kids are with your ex this year on Thanksgiving, or maybe you are going to a friend’s house but inside you couldn’t feel more alone.
Feeling alone, especially on a holiday can be terrible. It can make you feel like there’s something wrong with you, like no one cares about you, like you are all alone in the world, and like you are a loser.
What I want to say is: none of those things are true! If you are alone on Thanksgiving this year, here are some things to think about:
- Forget the pressure of Thanksgiving and just enjoy your day. Every day is a gift that should be spent in a positive way. Do something you love. Take a hot bath, cook for yourself, watch a movie you love. You have the freedom to do anything you’d like. Every day is and should be treated like a gift. Take advantage of it.
- Keep things in perspective. Think about the life you have. Don’t focus on what happened, things you wish you had and what you wish could be. Concentrate on your health, your kids, and the life you want moving forward. Remember that next year on Thanksgiving, your life could be totally different. (If you want it to be.)
- Ask yourself why you feel alone. Do you need support? Do you need to get help? The best thing you can do for yourself if you feel constantly lonely is to do something about it. You owe it to yourself. You deserve to be happy. Take care of yourself emotionally, the same way you would if you had a horrible cold.
- Love yourself. Perhaps this is most important in getting through Thanksgiving alone. Having self-love will give you the confidence and strength to get through even the toughest times and realize that every situation is temporary.
In closing, remember this. There is nothing nothing nothing wrong with spending time alone. Whether it’s just a Sunday or a major holiday that comes with external pressure to be with family and have fun. Also, remember that if you have family and friends who love and care for you (and you love and care for them), no matter if you are physically with them or not, you are never alone.
I said I wouldn’t do this but I am. I am going to tell you to have gratitude for Thanksgiving, and all the wonderful things and people in your life. Say a prayer for world peace, especially in light of recent events that took the lives of so many people. And pray for yourself—for courage and thick skin and the wisdom to make the right decisions, even if they are the most difficult.