There’s nothing worse than sitting by the phone waiting for a guy to call after a first date. Sometimes you never hear from him and wonder ‘what went so wrong?’ In my Love Essentially column, published in Chicago Tribune Pioneer Press, I offer 7 dating tips that will help increase the chances of your next first date turning into a a lot more!
7 Tips To Turn a First Date into Many Many More by Jackie Pilossoph
We’ve all been there. You’re sitting across the table from someone who you think is close to perfect. Smiling from ear to ear, you sip wine and barely eat as you gaze into his or her beautiful eyes, unable to believe that after countless awful dates, you actually met someone who stopped your world.
I’m describing a really, really great first date. Unfortunately, no one gets too many of those, as lots of first dates end in disappointment, irritation, and nightmare stories you end up sharing with your friends. So, how can you turn a first date into many, many more?
With the help of Erika Kybartas, a matchmaker for It’s Just Lunch in Chicago, we came up with seven tips we think will improve your chances.
1. Dress to Impress: “Before you leave the house for any date, look in the mirror and say, ‘Would I want to date me?'” said Kybartas, who has been in the business for 14 years, estimating she has set up thousands of couples during that time, hundreds which have resulted in long-term relationships. According to Kybartas, dress code for a dinner date is jeans, a nice top and heels, or a dress if you prefer. For men, she recommends business casual: jeans, a nice pair of shoes, a button down and sport coat. If coming to the date straight from work, a suit is acceptable. “Look like you put some effort into your outfit,” Kybartas said.
2. Choose the right venue: Keep first dates casual and short in length. Drinks and appetizers, lunch or coffee are great options. Wait for a second or third date to do something more active or that will result in spending a longer amount of time together. Great second or third dates include golf, tennis, a museum, or a paint and sip studio.
3. Be open-minded: “You can’t change a bad personality, but you can always change a bad T-shirt or an unlikable mustache,” Kybartas said. In other words, if you’re a little bit unsure, keep talking! Keep asking questions and getting to know the person. You might just fall in love, and can then talk to him or her about superficial changes later.
4. Talk is important: Good topics for a first date: common interests and lighthearted subjects that make you both laugh. Bad topics: money, finances, religion, politics and past relationships. Also, if you start talking negatively about your ex, or call him or her a name, I can guarantee you will never hear from your date again. Ever.