Regardless of whether it was a long time coming or you couldn’t get it over with fast enough, or even if the situation was amicable, divorce can be a messy process. It takes time, money, and is typically emotionally draining, no matter how you look at it. Yet, when the smoke has cleared, you are a newly divorced woman, no longer legally bound to another individual. This opens up countless avenues!
So, what do you do as a newly divorced woman? We recommend that you start by engaging in a few things purely for yourself.
Here are 6 fulfilling things to do as a newly divorced woman:
1. Travel To See A Friend
Companionship is essential when anything major is happening in your life, and going through a divorce is no exception. Don’t isolate yourself and reminisce or mull over the past. In fact, do the exact opposite. Now is the perfect time to finally make and go through with those plans to go see that friend you always promised you would.
Even if it takes some logistical effort and money to do so, it will provide you with fresh experiences and the comfort of a loving friend to help with whatever you are going through. You’ll thank yourself after, and the vacation will be a healthy reminder that you are still the fun, spontaneous person you remember yourself as.
2. Find A Therapist
Even if you went to marriage counseling and never feel like talking to a therapist again, make this time in your life all about you. Find a therapist that you feel comfortable with and can open up to about all aspects of your life, and not just the things involving a partner.
People are often pleasantly surprised by how much seeing a therapist can help, even if they may not desperately need the help. With a therapist, you can talk through your divorce in ways that you might not be able to with others, and anything else that you might need to get out of your system. Who knows, you may even learn things about yourself that will help you jump-start this next chapter of your life.
3. Start A Project or a New Hobby
Doing something creative can be helpful in almost any difficult situation. It keeps your mind active, your hands busy, and you in the present. If there was something you always wanted to do like start a garden, paint, learn an instrument, take dance lessons, you guessed it, now’s the time. If you feel like you don’t have the time, attempt to take the time to try something new.
You may just fall in love with something that you never expected to, and find that activity that gives you a new sense of identity, purpose, and even community in some situations. All in all, find something that interests you and give it a try. Also, don’t be discouraged if it takes trying a few things to discover what’s right for you.
4. Take Yourself On a Date
Who made the rule that going to dinner or a movie or a museum is supposed to be done with someone special? While it’s nice to share experiences with others, it’s also important to also do things alone to stay in tune with yourself. This is particularly true if you just ended a long-term partnership.
When married, a lot of free time is spent with your spouse, like turning a night without the kids into a date night or going on a vacation together. Unfortunately, in some cases, individuality goes right out the window and it can be easy to forget that having another person isn’t required to do anything. If you’re freshly out of a divorce, take this time to take yourself on dates. Go to that museum you’ve always wanted to, tour a new city, go to a concert. Have these experiences for yourself, because no one is stopping you.
5. Make New Friends
Nobody ever said that making friends is easy, but when experiencing a major life change such as a divorce, it never hurts to have people with similar experiences that you can turn to. Sometimes, others that haven’t gone through the same things you have really can’t fully understand despite the fact that they may try. If you’re up for it, there are even groups specifically for divorced women, which could provide a great opportunity for some new fellowship and connections.
6. Start Keeping A Journal
In both life’s ups and downs, it’s always good practice to keep a journal. Writing out your thoughts can help you remember the good times, and see how far you’ve come since the bad. When you are newly divorced, your mind can be moving a million miles a minute, and keeping a journal can help you organize and evaluate them as they come.
The journal is all about you, your struggles, and your triumphs. It doesn’t judge or expect anything of you, and there are plenty who will testify to the effectiveness of keeping one. You don’t have to write a biography either, just whatever you’re most comfortable with at first.
Divorce is no picnic, and when the legal part is over, life afterward can seem daunting. Think of this time as a new chapter or re-awakening. The world is your oyster, and what you do next us all up to you, so you might as well enjoy it.
About The Author:
Jackson Sawa is a legal content writer for Haque Legal, PLC, a Southfield, Michigan-based law firm with a focus on family law, personal injury, and criminal defense. A graduate of California State University, Chico, his writings focus on mental and physical health, family law, and other legal matters.
Like this article? Check out, “20 Things I Wish I Could Have Told My Newly Separated Self.”