How Do You Get Over Being Bitter In A Relationship?

how do you get over being bitter in a relationship

By Jackie Pilossoph, Creator and Editor-in-chief, Divorced Girl Smiling site, podcast and app, Love Essentially columnist and author

There’s no question that breakups are painful and difficult. But after the initial anger, grieving and devastation, most people start to put their lives back together and move on. Most people. There are some who just can’t get over the anger and bitterness they are feeling. They want to, but something keeps them from being able to do so. So, how do you get over being bitter in a relationship? In this week’s Love Essentially, published in the Chicago Tribune Pioneer Press and several other papers across the U.S., I offer 8 tips to shaking breakup bitterness.

Eight Ways To Get Over Breakup Bitterness

by Jackie Pilossoph for Chicago Tribune Pioneer Press

When people are newly separated or broken up, it’s normal to feel pain, with emotions that include devastation, sadness, fear, anger, and resentment. But as time goes by, I think one of two things happens: either the person begins to accept the end of the relationship and moves forward, focusing on his or her own life, or they succumb to a dreaded word that creeps in, making it nearly impossible to find peace and happiness.

That word: bitterness.


Katz and Stefani Family Law Attorneys


I recently got an email from a divorced reader who wrote that after three years, he is still bitter, and deeply unhappy. He said he doesn’t want to be this way, and has tried therapy, volunteering, dating and not dating to shake the bitterness. But still, he feels bitter.

My reader gave me a few reasons for his bitterness, including the fact that his wife remarried very quickly to a man he suspects she left him for, and that she is doing well in her career, while he has struggled financially, and has had to move into an apartment with roommates. He said he might be able to let go of his bitterness if she called and apologized, and admitted what she did was wrong and unfair.


Want Financial Security After Divorce?


I truly feel for this guy because the situation does feel unfair. (Click here to read the rest of the article, published in the Chicago Tribune Pioneer Press, and several other publications across the U.S.)

Like this article? Check out, “Being Newly Separated Means Grieving Your Breakup”



Buy novels by Jackie Pilossoph
Take the quiz to get recommendations Divorced Girl Smiling Trusted Partners

Sign up for the Divorced Girl Smiling newsletter to get weekly articles on divorce and dating.

Sign up
Listen to the Divorced Girl Smiling podcast! a weekly show about divorce and dating Download the Divorced Girl Smiling mobile app


Ruthe Schwartz, Insurance and Financial Professional
Tracy Coenen - The Divorce Money Guide
Divorced Girl Smiling welcome video
Jackie Pilossoph

Editor-in-chief: Jackie Pilossoph

Divorced Girl Smiling is here to empower, connect and inspire you. Jackie Pilossoph is the creator and Editor-In-Chief of Divorced Girl Smiling, the site, the podcast and the app. A former television journalist and newspaper features reporter, Pilossoph is also the author of four novels and the writer of her weekly relationship column, Love Essentially. Pilossoph holds a Masters degree in journalism and lives in Chicago with her two teenagers. The author of the novels, Divorced Girl Smiling and Free Gift With Purchase, Pilossoph also writes the weekly dating and relationships advice column, “Love Essentially”, published in the Chicago Tribune Pioneer Press and the Chicago Tribune online. Additionally, she is a Huffington Post contributor. Pilossoph holds a Masters degree in journalism from Boston University.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.